Don’t Drop the Ball

Goodbye 2013!  Hello 2014!  Some traditions will never die ……Out with the old, in with the new, the countdown to midnight, the singing of Auld Lang Syne, the dropping of the famous Waterford crystal ball from atop of a flagpole at One Times Square in NYC.  Every December 31, no less than one million spectators converge upon Times Square to enjoy a complimentary fun night of entertainment along with the 2,000 pounds of confetti and fireworks.

The prevalence of the Times Square ball drop has also inspired similar “drops” at local New Year’s Eve celebrations.  In Central Pennsylvania, it’s not the largest party of the year but smaller celebration “drops” include a strawberry, a Hershey Kiss, a pickle, a white rose to name a few.

With 2014 brings another age-old tradition, making New Year’s resolutions.  The most common resolutions according to the Harris poll with apps that can help you reach goal:

1. Lose weight – Nutrino: Enter your current and target weighs and food preferences and this app builds a personalized menu to bring closer to your goal. (Free with iOS, Android coming soon)
2. Improve Your Finances – Budget Boss:  Create a budget quickly and effortlessly – then watch your predicted savings grow with easy-to-do read graphs.  ($0.99 with iOS)
3. Exercise – Human:  Commit to moving at least 30 minutes every day with this simple app, which uses location tracking to measure your activity and notifies you when your done. (Free with iOS) I will be downloading this one.
4. Get A New Job – Job Search:  Find open positions near you and submit applications from your phone.  (Free with iOS and Android)
5.  Eat Healthier  – Fooducate: Scan grocery barcodes and get a nutrition grade from A to D with this award-winning app.  (Free with iOS and Android)

Unfortunately, the statistics are against one trying to make a major lifestyle change.  Ninety percent who set New Year’s resolutions fail to achieve their goals.

According to the University of Scranton Journal of Clinical Psychology, their studies show that before week three or four into the New Year, most people will abandon that dream, vision or desire.  Why?  What happens?

Looking back is easy but looking forward is a little more challenging especially when one wants to make some changes. Change it up in 2014 Change what?  Job? Spiritual Growth? Financial Aspirations? Health/Wellness?

It generally takes 30 – 40 days to make a lifestyle behavior change. According to Daniel Hall-Flavin, MD, psychiatrist and addiction expert, Dr Hall-Flavin explains the psychology behind difficulties keeping resolutions, “Truly bettering yourself is a lifestyle change, not a spur-of-the-moment type of decision.”

Lifestyle changes are a process that take time and require support.  Once you’re ready to make a change, the difficult part is following through.  So do your research and make a plan that will prepare you for success.  Careful planning means setting small goals and taking things one step at a time.

 Here are five tips from the American Psychological Association to help you make lasting, positive lifestyle and behavior changes:

Make a plan that will stick.  Your plan is a map that will guide you on this journey of change.  You can even think of it as an adventure.  When making your plan, be specific.  Want to exercise more?  Detail the time of day when you can take walks and how long you’ll walk.  Write everything down, and ask yourself if you’re confident that these activities and goals are realistic for you.  If not start with smaller steps.  Post your plan or “vision board” where you’ll often see it as a reminder.

Start small.  After you’ve identified realistic short-term and long-term goals, break down your goals into small, manageable steps that are specifically defined and can be measured. Is your long-term goal to lose 20 pounds within the next five months?  A good weekly goal would be to lose one pound a week.  If you would like to eat healthier, consider as a goal for the week replacing dessert with a healthier option, like fruit or yogurt.  At the end of the week, you’ll feel successful knowing you met your goal.

Change one behavior at a time.  Unhealthy behaviors develop over the course of time, so replacing unhealthy behaviors with healthy ones require time.  Many people run into problems when they try to change too much too fast.  To improve your success, focus on one goal or change at a time.  As new behaviors become a habit, try to add another goal that works toward the overall change you’re striving for.

Involve a buddy.  Whether it be a friend, co-worker or family member, someone else on your journey will keep you motivated and accountable.  Perhaps it can be someone who will go tot the gym with you or someone who is also trying to stop smoking.  Talk about what you are doing.  Consider joining a support group.  Having someone with whom to share your struggles and successes makes the work easier and the mission less intimidating .

Ask for support.  Accepting help from those who care about you and will listen strengthens your resilience and commitment.  If you feel overwhelmed or unable to meet your goals on your own, consider seeking help from a psychologist.  Psychologists are uniquely trained to understand the connection between the mind and body, as well as the factors that promote behavior change.  Asking for help does;t mean a lifetime of therapy, even just a few sessions can help you examine and set attainable goals or address the emotional issues that ma be getting in your way.

Making the changes that you want takes time and commitment, but you can do it.  Just remember that no one is perfect.  You will have occasional lapses.  Be kind to yourself.  When you eat a brownie or skip the gym, don’t give up. Minor missteps on the road to your goals are normal and okay.  Resolve to recover and get back on track.

When one gets to be a women of a certain age like myself, past roles fade, it’s an excellent time of re-invention, look for new opportunities, seek a fresh start, new beginnings, transform your life, set new visions, dreams and desires. I took my own advice to stay relevant, this year, I choose to physically challenge myself with my first ever Nike Half-Marathon where I raised $2000.00 for Leukemia and Lymphoma. Another big moment from 2013 –  fulfilling my desire to share health and fashion information with women in my age group via this blog, interesting combo, huh?  These two events were included on my 2012 vision board for 2013 √√

My debut post for Age of Grace, I shared about my daughter’s vision/dream to live and work in fashion in New York City.  I hope you had a chance to follow her story where nearly one year later, my daughter, Channing is indeed living and working in the city of New York.
Channing’s vision board inspired me to do my own visual board, adults have dreams too. According to Christine Kane’s “The Complete Guide to Vision Boards” a vision board (also sometimes called a Treasure Map or an Image Bank or Creativity Collage) is a poster board.  On a poster board, you paste or collage images that you’ve torn out from various magazines.  The images can be very specific – as in my desire to start a blog.  Or they can be images that evoke a feeling – like a woman walking or running in a marathon.
I agree with what I learned about vision boards, “Vision boards put goals in your subconscious mind, where they steer your everyday choices toward making the vision happen.”  In additional to having a visual reminder of my goals with the vision board, I also incorporate S.M.A.R.T. goals:

• S – Specific Goals: Who, What, When, Where, Why, How?
• M – Measurable:  How will you know when you’re done?
• A – Attainable:  Is this realistic?
• R –  Relevant:  This is your big “why” – how your goal relates to and supports your                          ethics, and the people in your life that you care about.
• T – Time-Based:  You have to have time limits or it’s not a goal, it’s just a to-do list that can go on forever

If this is your first introduction to S.M.A.R.T Goals, you may find this planning guide from Wake Forest University helpful – download it free here

I hope you find this information helpful and are inspired to do a vision board or utilize S.M.A.R.T. goals for setting your short-term and long-term objectives for 2014. Don’t drop the “proverbial” ball this year.

“A Goal Without A Plan Is Just…….A Wish”  Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Happy New Year!